2015-11-28 22:12![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
snapdragon76
snapdragon76I have less than two weeks before I graduate and still so much to do. I have to write a six page research paper by the 9th and finish up my online portfolio. I'm trying not to freak out about it, but I tend to do that anyway (thanks, Anxiety). Then I have other problems to deal with, like my insurance premiums going up drastically and only having limited funds. I probably wont even be able to get a job for six months after I graduate and in the interim, I'll be dead ass broke. I'll probably have to look into a part time job in the meantime, which has never been an easy task. I'm trying not to feel discouraged right now, because I want to focus on the positives, at least until after graduation. It majorly sucks, being below the poverty line. I just want to have a job where I can have a comfortable existence and not have to wonder where my next meal is coming from, or being unable to pay my bills and where I don't feel like I'm just existing.
Sorry for the complaining. I get these moods where I just feel sorry for myself and can't shake it. I think it's part of my Depression. I haven't even been on my Flist for weeks because I just can't put in the effort anymore. I keep it though, because the rare few of you who do actually post anything anymore, I want to stick around. Plus, I can say things on here that I can't anywhere else, and I think it helps a little bit, even if no one ever reads it.
I did manage to have my hair re-hennaed yesterday. It looks nice. It'll most likely settle into it's more 'permanent' color in a few weeks, in time for me to graduate. I also have to practice my very rust makeup skills for 'the big day'. I feel like I'm getting married. I have announcements, a gown, photographs, a rehearsal, etc... No honeymoon, though. But, I'm excited and will be looking forward to it and for it to be over with. I just hope I'm able to find a job at a good school as well as be able to move (if I need to) once the time comes. Adulthood really sucks...
Sorry for the complaining. I get these moods where I just feel sorry for myself and can't shake it. I think it's part of my Depression. I haven't even been on my Flist for weeks because I just can't put in the effort anymore. I keep it though, because the rare few of you who do actually post anything anymore, I want to stick around. Plus, I can say things on here that I can't anywhere else, and I think it helps a little bit, even if no one ever reads it.
I did manage to have my hair re-hennaed yesterday. It looks nice. It'll most likely settle into it's more 'permanent' color in a few weeks, in time for me to graduate. I also have to practice my very rust makeup skills for 'the big day'. I feel like I'm getting married. I have announcements, a gown, photographs, a rehearsal, etc... No honeymoon, though. But, I'm excited and will be looking forward to it and for it to be over with. I just hope I'm able to find a job at a good school as well as be able to move (if I need to) once the time comes. Adulthood really sucks...
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