2010-10-13 09:46![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
snapdragon76
snapdragon76Ugh, feeling another emotional downswing right now. I just have to ride it out until it passes like usual. It kinda sucks though. Still, it’s not as bad as it has been in the past. While at my worst I’ve never felt suicidal, I have felt like I wish I’d never been born. But those were pretty rare occasions I gotta admit, thankfully. I mean, there was one time where I just laid on the bathroom floor crying, but that was only once and I haven’t felt like that in a few years now.
The medication I’m on does help, even though one of them does make me pretty drowsy. I mean, I’m not a total zombie or anything, but it does make it hard for me to wake up in the mornings. I’ve adjusted my medication as much as I can, so there’s not too much that can be done about it. At least I can still function on a day to day basis.
Sorry for putting this out there and all, but that’s the function of a journal really. Writing out your feelings and learning to cope and stuff. Sometimes just writing things out and seeing it in black and white helps you to deal with it and to recover fairly quickly. Kinda therapeutic in a way. Plus, you have something to look back on and say to yourself, ‘Wow, I was really feeling pretty low then.’
But, I have so much to look forward to, so I fully intend on sticking around. I never planned otherwise. Besides, my parents already lost one child, I’m not gonna deprive them of another. That would just be stupid and selfish. My life is pretty decent, I gotta say. I got friends and family who think I’m pretty ok. I just gotta keep that in the back of my mind on the low times.
See ya around! See, I’m starting to feel a little bit better already!
The medication I’m on does help, even though one of them does make me pretty drowsy. I mean, I’m not a total zombie or anything, but it does make it hard for me to wake up in the mornings. I’ve adjusted my medication as much as I can, so there’s not too much that can be done about it. At least I can still function on a day to day basis.
Sorry for putting this out there and all, but that’s the function of a journal really. Writing out your feelings and learning to cope and stuff. Sometimes just writing things out and seeing it in black and white helps you to deal with it and to recover fairly quickly. Kinda therapeutic in a way. Plus, you have something to look back on and say to yourself, ‘Wow, I was really feeling pretty low then.’
But, I have so much to look forward to, so I fully intend on sticking around. I never planned otherwise. Besides, my parents already lost one child, I’m not gonna deprive them of another. That would just be stupid and selfish. My life is pretty decent, I gotta say. I got friends and family who think I’m pretty ok. I just gotta keep that in the back of my mind on the low times.
See ya around! See, I’m starting to feel a little bit better already!
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